Introduction

 

Hello, my name is Linda March.  I am a wellness and safety advocate. I am married and have children. My husband and I have a successful and strong bond. Before raising my children, I was an executive secretary. I'm fortunate to have wonderful parents and family. I've had wonderful moments in my life. Although, I have had to struggle with PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) since my mid-twenties. Unfortunately, I have been a victim of abuse (physical and mental) in the behavioral mental health field. People are stressed out in those jobs and may not give the best care to their patients at times, but I feel that there are also cruel people that have a goal of keeping you in the system for their career and monetary gains. The man who I first encountered back in 1988 disabled me since I left there. He died a few years after I was his patient. Maybe his cruelty finally took a toll on his spirit. My nightmares don't go away. I wake up screaming at times and then have to run......that's how I feel. I actually do run out of bed and go to my main living area to exercise, dance to music or clean. Sometimes, though, I'm half awake and so scared I go out of the house, or for a drive to calm down. This is a big worry on my wonderful family. Unfortunately, he wasn't my only nightmare in this field. I went in with PTSD and developed more from my hospital stays. I feel that people in this practice need constant help for themselves so that they can positively help people suffering and get on a better path to wellness.

I'm a stable person other than when I'm in a PTSD hyper/manic fear mode. Fortunately for me, I’m not in this state constantly. My issue is more seasonal affective and also triggered due to my trauma happening at certain times. I will write about this in more detail under separate cover. Fear makes me stay up and be on the lookout for anyone or anything bad coming our way. Several days of no sleep then, I will appear a bit off. lol   A lot off at times, as no sleep or proper nutrition gets me in a delusion and fearful state. This is when my car keys are taken away from me by my loved ones and for good reason. I don't go out to hurt myself or anyone else though. Imagine the folks that have very difficult lives, worse issues than me, no support from loved ones, and their anger and fear put them in a mode to protect themselves. They think we are all the enemy, good folks or bad folks, little children. They are neurologically off. They go and shoot up people at schools and large events. I am an artist and musician, so the things I do is maybe sing, be comical with my voice and comments, or scream too loud outside. Anger could bring me to let people know loudly that I'm exercising like in the army.

The psychiatrists would confuse my delusional state with being psychotic and give me anti-psychotic medicine that would make me worse. The side effects were horrific giving me jittery energy which made me feel I need to jump off a building. Very counter intuitive since I was going in the hospital to get sleep. What worked for me is getting something to put me to sleep. Once I slept, my mind was always clear. My family and I would tell staff this when going into the hospital, but they would never listen and fill me with all kinds of horrible medicines. I would have to withdraw from everything once I was released. Hoping to inform and educate so you and your loved ones can get better treatment and support. I have lost so much trust suffering for years from abuse under the supervision of doctors who had authority to dictate what goes in my body. If my story helps any one person lessen their pain and get back to living a healthier life, that’s a blessing. There needs to be more individualized treatment in these places and more respect for the patients and families.

          My journey has led me away from all mainstream doctors in this field. It’s been years of going to holistic self-care now. I haven’t rid myself of my PTSD, but learned more positive and healthy ways to cope. Along my way, I have met some wonderful people that have the same passion as I do. Please refer to my Wellness & Holistic Doctor Recommendations if interested.

In my opinion, we have become a very sick society. So much backwards thinking. A lot of health businesses have become reliable on sick people. The thinking is more treat a symptom with a drug instead of find the causes. We need drugs at times, but they are overused in my opinion. As previously stated, for me personally, the drugs made me worse. Unfortunately, over the years I knew several folks, especially the young, who got worse after starting the psych meds and attempted or committed suicide. Some have to be on meds, or do fine on meds. Long term use can do damage to other parts of our mind/body though. I’m writing my experience with hopes to inform others to be their own advocate and fight for fair, just and correct treatments. This is why I am so passionate about sharing my journey.

My thinking is if I can find something more natural to not weaken my organs and systems in my body, I will go for that first before any drugs. One drug I was on years ago could have affected my kidneys after long use so I had to go for regular blood tests. Got off that one. One med had a fatal rash risk. I got a rash, but it wasn't fatal to me. It scared the heck out of me when I saw a little blob of a rash starting on my shin. I was told the fatal rash would have spread quickly and look differently. Well, either way I got a rash taking that med, so not a good sign. Once my body got used to the med, it went away. I got off that one. While on it, I would take 1/4 of the recommended dose. There are nutrients and vitamins we are lacking. There are many alternative treatments available out there such as neurofeedback and doctors clearing the metal and other toxins from your system. I do not take any meds anymore.  I still have to deal with my PTSD highs that come with fear and panic, but not the added side effects from all the meds. Such as more nightmares, high blood pressure, thyroid side effects, heart palpitations, extreme anxiety, weight gain and more.

Fear is also being spread in so many ways in our world. My illness is based on fear and it is hard to conquer, but doable. I have to work on it every day. Some days I fall, but then get up and try again. I'm crippled with PTSD from personal trauma, concussions and abuse (mental, sexual). The sad thing is that going for help exposed me to more mental and sexual abuse.

There are a lot of good caretakers out in our world and I commend them. We need our doctors and healers. What we don't need is plain outright abuse in the systems. Or is it ignorance? I know I live in a dream world because my hope is to see all healers work together with government, drug companies and insurance companies’ cooperation. Insurance and Medicare/caid covering holistic healing services also. I urge everyone to be their own health advocate for all medical issues. Research, get several opinions, etc.

Wouldn't it be nice if our billionaires invested in whole health wellness. Think of the productivity of what healthy, well-minded people can produce. Then they can still make their zillions by investing in other people’s awesomeness! I guess the more money you have, the more fear you feel thinking of losing it. There's that fear problem again.

I live my life daily around town trying to be safe and watch out for the safety of others. I am a musician and enjoy dancing and exercising to music. I was a gymnast and cheerleader growing up. I haven’t outgrown it either.  I’ll cheer myself and others on daily!! All my life I sing and move to the music, so I do that around town at times too. If I make you laugh at me, good. If you laugh with me, good. We all need laughter daily.

Anyone suffering from depression, drug addiction, anxiety, autism, manic, etc...... I encourage you to use your will to fight for wellness. There are lots of people who care, seek them out. Our lives are precious and worth living!!!

My blog will have music videos, testimonials of my journey and others who care to share. I will share wonderful health advocates, businesses, books, etc.  Looking forward to sharing with anyone who cares to look, listen and love.

Inspiration and fun while continuing to plug along in this life that can be very difficult at moments.

Good day.